Big Things have happened this weekend!! It is official. Jackson is walking!!!!! He has been furniture walking for several months and one finger holding for about the same and a few steps here and there, but he always seemed to get scared about three steps into any adventure and sit down (kind of like his mom). We have tile downstairs in our townhouse and he is no dummy. That stuff is hard and he knows it will hurt. We were outside watching an airplane sky write something (ironically "Jesus Loves You") and I looked over and he was walking away. Far away...and he just kept going until he reached what he wanted. It was so wonderful.

It kind of parallels our life as a "faith community". We began gathering right when he was born, so it seems that we hit small milestones right along with him. I could of never imagined what it would be like to be a mom, let alone of a mom of a toddler. In the same manner I could not of imagined the beautiful people God would gather around us for the journey. You guys are precious! There is no where else I rather be doing this than with you all!

Some responses from Wednesday night after a time of silence...

How are we to make Jesus the center of everything we do?

- We don't make Jesus the center, He is the center. It's our choice to act like it's true.
- God is King. He is on the throne. You don't invite him on your "throne", i.e. "make Him King". (See this illustration from the "Four Spiritual Laws" which sort of propagates the strange idea of us having the ability to make God King.)
- If Jesus is the center, you are not!

What types of activities would naturally draw others and us into his kingdom?

- Conversations. Throw out the programs and just intentionally carry the Kingdom into your real life.
- Small things like sharing your story. Ask questions that make people have to actually think about an answer instead of just making small talk.
- Systematically engaging in spiritual disciplines with Kingdom as the primary focus - study, prayer, etc.
- Loving my wife and caring for my family. The test of love - how you treat those closest to you.
- Allow the Holy Spirit to meet other people's needs instead of taking matters into our own hands.
- Fishing analogy - Instead of making nets to catch fish, become the bait!

What would our community look like if our exclusive primary goal were spiritual formation in Christlikeness?

- Extreme love.
- God: Humble yourself, love one another, and I'll make you like Jesus.
- A community of servants. Instead of trying to get people into our program, we ask "how can we serve?"
- This is supposed to be fun. Growing together in Christlikeness is not a drudgery. Sure it can be painful, but why not try to have a good time along the way?

Questions we will ponder tonight...

- How are we to make Jesus the center of everything we do?
- What types of activities would naturally draw others and us into his kingdom?
- What would our community look like if our exclusive primary goal were spiritual formation in Christlikeness?

I'll let you know how it goes. Here's a quote by Leith Anderson (via Willard in Renovation of the Heart) that kind of sparked some of this:

“While the New Testament speaks often about churches, it is surprisingly silent about many matters that we associate with church structure and life. There is no mention of architecture, pulpits, lengths of typical sermons (or sermons!), rules for having a Sunday school. Little is said about style of music, order of worship, or times of church gatherings. There were no Bibles, denominations, camps, pastor’s conferences, or board meeting minutes. Those who strive to be New Testament churches must seek to live its principles and absolutes, not reproduce the details.”

If you didn't read it on Coop's blog, you need to browse through this article on megachurches. I will resist making a comment only because I'd get myself in trouble. I will only post one telling quote:

''The reasons why churches are getting bigger are the same reasons why your Costco, your Wal-Mart, your Home Depot and Lowes are expanding and are successful,'' says Charlie Bradshaw, executive pastor of North Coast Church, which has 5,500 members in Vista, Calif., a suburb of San Diego. ''They're providing what you're looking for in options and prices, and that's why people are driving by the mom 'n' pop stores.''

Oh my. Consumerism at its best.

This morning in staff meeting... at Youth for Christ... my friend Leland Herring lead our Bible discussion. In it he said, "Why do we try to go to church and act like we're perfect? I think church should be more like an AA meeting where I come in and say, 'I'm Leland and this is what I've been struggling with this week.'" I thought, Leland really gets it. He understands what Ahren was saying about churches needing to be more like 12 step groups.

I used to be a nanny for this guy named Randy Schindler. He was this really amazing guy... humble, gentle... and he was a recovering alcoholic. There's something about people who have lost everything. I mean in the sense that they know that they're own best efforts got them to destruction and now they're willing to have someone else lead the way. They're very appealing. I think that teenagers really sense that they want a release from the pressure to do the right thing. I think that this feeling is a little more raw for them. A lot of them rebel because they can't be the perfection that is expected. I think I rebel, too. I think I rebel by sleeping and reading too much.

A bunch of us in our community have wacky... no, let me be honest... disturbing financial situations right now. I think for me, more than any other area of my life (well, maybe not) this is an area where I want to be okay... self-reliant, self-sufficient and solid. It's a scary area. Maybe that's true for more people than just me. So, maybe this is the next step for me, "My name is Lori, and I won't release my finances to God." There. I feel better just saying it. They say that's the first step, right?

I just read AMBER'S blog (oops--sorry girl!) below, and it pointed me in a good direction. I've been thinking a lot lately about God's sovereignty. Phrases like "I can do nothing without the Father" and "Not that we loved God, but he loved us" and "I chose you before the foundation of the world" have been really changing me. God really is the ultimate Ruler, and he can do whatever he wants. I have wondered at times, as I know many have, "If God is sovereign, why do anything?" The only reason I know of is that he asks us to. That he wants us to. Also, he holds himself back many times until we respond to him out of love and desire for him. He wants us to realize that he is King and can do whatever he wants, that talking to Him is far more important than talking to people, that he doesn't need us for anything, but that he wants to use us, bless us, and be our friend. He is love so he is good, but he refuses to force himself. He wants us to ask for his Kingdom to come--not because it's what good little Christians do--but because we really think that anything and everything would be better if Jesus was really King over it. He wants us to really believe that!! With our hearts!! He wants us to really believe he is the most wonderful, the most beautiful, the most loving and perfect God and King, and then act appropriately with that belief.

Unfortunately, I carry this conviction along with several others that are diametrically opposed to it.

I, in my human nature, so badly want to take all of God's good stuff--the love, the power, the wisdom--and make it something that is primarily for me, for my life in this world, or even for my church. Somewhere in my brain is the ever-ready temptation to make me the top of the blessing/food chain. I forget who God is sometimes. I forget that he deserves to have things his way. Out of nowhere, I start to believe that I am entitled to a certain measure of autonomy or blessing or happiness . . . or something. I guess I don't really "start" to think this way as much as that way of thinking is just there ready for me to adopt at any moment . . .

For all of the above reasons, God is not safe, but he is good. I am not the top of any chain. And as far as I know, Jesus is the only one who has a Church. To think otherwise is to think a lie. THAT is not good. God knows this. But he really is the best, most beautiful, kindest, and most perfect Being anywhere. That he even notices us is a miracle. We need to grip the thought that God is soooo good. We WANT him to be King over us, over everything. But part of us is threatened and doesn't want to lose . . .

On Spiritual Formation
Passivity was for the Israelites, and is for us one of the greatest dangers and difficulties of our spiritual existence. The land promised to them was one of incredible goodness - "flowing with milk and honey," as it is repeatedly described. But it still had to be conquered by careful, persistent, and intelligent human action, over a long period of time. -- Willard, Renovation of the Heart

I think as emerging churches we need to continually preach the "good news" of the kingdom. The abundant life is available here and now, through slow, small, steady steps toward Chirstlikness. God calling, we responding....and on and on it goes for all of this lifetime and the next. That is were we are right now as a community. For the next month we will spend our time on Wednesday evenings waiting, praying, responding and gaining direction from our Father the source of all life. We did this together as a community back in March and it was amazing to hear God together as a small community. More people have joined our little band since then and we are sensing that there are new things for us to experiment with together. It is exciting and scary all at once. Sunday I referenced a line from The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. One of the children was asking a local of Narnia about Aslan and said "He looks terribly scary. Is he safe?" They answered with a laugh, "Safe? No he is not safe, but he is good". I love that line. We did not start out on this journey because it was safe but because no matter what we encounter He is Good!

Isaiah 40
30Even youths will become exhausted, and young men will give up. 31But those who wait on the LORD will find new strength. They will fly high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.

My butt is draggin'...... Maybe I need to wait on God more? That and go to bed earlier!

From Brennan Manning's website newsletter, via Kevin Rains:

"A WalMart supercenter recently opened a short distance away. Yesterday was my first visit. It is 1800 feet smaller than Rhode Island."

"For the many whose Christianity dangles from the chief modifier, American, nothing is seriously wrong with our country. On the contrary, the present war is "just", the evil is the "lesser", and all our efforts are not only blessed by God but in perfect conformity to His (sic) will."

Well, I just figured out the online version of the Message is encrypted, i.e. no printing. So much for open-source bible.

Update: If you're really desperate to print something out, you can capture the text and import it into a program like photoshop.

Navpress has posted the Message in its entirety here. Warning...it's a pdf file that is quite large. So don't click on it, you people with wimpy connections.

I am reading a book by Hannah Hurnard called The Kingdom of Love. It's a great little book about Hannah's experience as a missionary in Israel. Apparently when a bunch of violence started breaking out, (think the 40s) most missionaries left except for about 11 devoted people. This remnant had to decide to unify or essentially be ineffective. They wanted to do some sort of community outreach meeting, but there was not enough common ground to build the meetings on. A group of 3 people (Hannah included) began to pray for unity as well as the baptism of the Holy Spirit. Each person was praying for this baptism toward different ends... one toward signs and wonders, one toward power, but Hannah prayed toward... get this... a baptism of love. She adds that the only way such diversity can be unified is through a supernatural sort of love baptism...

All I'm saying is that this flew in the face of things I've heard my whole life. I feel like this really explains a lot. I don't know the end of the story yet for either of us... (my dogg Hannah and me.) I'll let you know.

I have not been on-line for a few weeks, and I am thrilled to see what God is doing in your (?my) community. I feel so excited, but yet SO SAD. :( I wish I could be there with you all. I miss living so intimately with you--praying, worshipping, laughing, and crying with you. I cherish the year we had together. I am thankful for the blog, but it can never replace actually living in the community itself.

This has been one of those happy, but sad kind of days. We got to see Baby Bish on the ultrasound, but he/she was all curled up in a ball. So the sex of the baby will remain a mystery!! Mark and I were really looking forward to finding out. But the baby looks healthy! Thank you Lord!

Mark and I are slowly getting settled into our new community. Sat. night we had 2 of his co-workers and their families over for dinner to say "thank you." They welcomed us into their houses and their lives during the first 3 weeks while we waited to close on our house. After dinner, we had a bon-fire in the back yard and made smores. (By the way, it was 50 degrees on Sat. night). Tomorrow night we are having dinner with a family from the Vineyard. And this weekend we might have an entire family from Sweden staying with us; they are putting on a spiritual disciplines seminar at our church.

I thank you, Father, for the amazing way You are working in this community. Your way always brings what is best for our lives. I thank You for bringing diversity together to encourage and strengthen Your body.

This is a quote from Teach Me to Pray by Andrew Murray

Jesus did not teach his disciples how to preach but how to pray. To know how to speak to God is more vital than knowing how to speak to men. It is power with God not man that is of supreme importance.

Jesus, teach our community how to pray, deeply, passionately, and with total dependency on you.

Introducing............our latest blog-friend, Lori Cooper (no relation to Mr. Jordon Cooper - he lives in Canada, where it is cold.) Thanks for your honest and quite cool post, Lori.

Wonderful day today. Amber got to sleep in, I got to play golf. Very restful and very needed. I would post my scorecard to brag because I played quite well today (76) but the card melted in my pocket on the 12th hole. Literally, it was so hot the thing just fell to pieces after soaking up my sweat. I know that's gross, but it's just the simple reality of living in South Florida.

Conversations. I think it was Brian McLaren who observed that instead of counting conversions we should be counting conversations. Over the past few weeks I've had the opportunity to engage in some wonderful conversations with Jesus seekers. Interestingly, most of them have been with people older than me - 25 years older in some cases. The common thread is a deep yearning for authentic expressions of community and life-transformation. And you thought it was just us younger folks that were rethinking old models and asking hard questions.

On Thursday, I spoke for an hour on the phone with a 43 year-old man from Michigan who is an outreach pastor of a large AoG church. You want to talk about rapid-fire deconstruction. And I quote..."I've been organizing event-style evangelism for years here and I can't name 15 people who are in our church following Jesus that came from those outreaches." Oh boy. The wheels are coming off...but in a good way if you know what I mean.

Okay, so this is my first blog ever. I've been thinking and thinking about the Renovation of the Heart blog, but I'm just not feeling it. Here's what I am feeling though. I am feeling that this community thing... the idea that we're going to be the church not just go to... is kind of freaking me out. I've been coming since June, and my new friends just keep getting more and more up in my bizniz. I'm kind of just kidding, but really it's quite uncomfortable.

A few weeks ago Kim came over to my apartment to help me organize. I'm excessively organic in the way I run my life. Anyways, she came over and was up in my stuff. She saw my insane bathroom closet and my un-putaway clothes and my makeup all over the counter. I told her it was uncomfortable and she comforted me and I felt better. The true test, however, came a couple of weeks later. After Kim left, I tried to go through a couple of boxes of "stuff"... you know... those miscellaneous boxes of junk and memories. I went through everything and made a bunch of piles and got freaked out and left them there. They've been there since that night... about 2 weeks. I've added to the piles and not put away my clothes and/or done laundry since then. Kim wanted to get together and I told her I couldn't... I really couldn't, but later realized I was RUNNING! I didn't want Kim to see how helpless I am when it comes to this nonsense. So, Wednesday I confessed this to her... and, well... here we go again. I'm going to go for it. This is very uncomfortable for me. I guess maybe this is what John meant when he said, "But if we are living in the light of God's presence, just as Christ does, then we have wonderful fellowship and joy with each other, and the blood of Jesus his son cleanses us from every sin." I guess part of me just prefers the darkness... it's more familiar.

Lot's of stuff on Bloggs out there about 9/11. Followers of Jesus are deeply convicted about war, terror, our response as a nation. I have an incredibly bad taste in my mouth over the American media and how they speak fear as if it is truth. It all makes me feel very melancholy. If we follow Jesus long enough and allow him in every where, it will mess with your politics. I want to know Jesus more and have him train me in his kingdom ways. I am a citizen of his kingdom and none other. That is where true freedom is found. Not in anything else, including where you live. I am free in Christ and if you are not in Christ you are not free, no matter where you live. There is no hope found in anything outside the kingdom and there is no safety anywhere except in Jesus. What am I saying. Living in the kingdom is the most dangerous place you will ever be, because you have to die. Dead as a doornail. Look people, this is dangerous, dangerous stuff. As T says "Are we here to overturn the world, or not?" Subvert - turn over from underneath. Oh man, I need to go be with Jesus right now because I am getting so mad at the "status quo" that I am going to throw something.
Jesus is King If I could scream it any louder I would. Jesus, Let my whole life "scream" that you are king and that is where my total allegiance lies!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well I'm back from my blogging hiatus. It was actually a pretty busy week so I didn't miss the blogosphere too much. Really not much at all, strangly.

However, I'm excited to report that I am now the proud owner of a wireless network. It is an open node, so if you are driving down Jupiter Village Road anytime soon and pass our townhouse on the east side of the road, feel free to stop and check your email. My warchalk is to the right. Yeah, I named my network 'gator' even though the Gators are now the laughing stock of college football. Hey, they're my alma mater. I have to be a Gator.

Was anyone else freaked out by the idea of us putting our names/e-mail/numbers down on a piece of paper? OK it is not a mailing list, or a phone tree, or a directory, or a membership list... it is simply a way for those of us to connect with each other outside our intentional gatherings. Phew! I feel better having said that:-) We always say structure is put in place for the needs of the particular people gathered and not the other way around. I guess we have a diverse enough group of people hanging out with us now that we have to help them live their lives together for real and not just talk about it.

God said to me months ago that September was going to be a big month for our community. I guess I did not really know what that meant. Well the curve ball God threw us last week had a lot to do with it. I am excited to see what God has for all of us as it relates towards our "outward journey" You guys now we are a little crazy, I guess you are as well or you would not be hanging our with us. It will be fun discovering from God as a community where we are to go together, and seeing how deep that will really take us together. Kind of scary, but I guess I am getting used to that.

Wow, It looks like this weekend was really cool for all of us. I was just having fun seeing the Kingdom of God manifest in real and powerful ways in the midst of ordinary, everyday, situations and circumstances. I hope the rest of you guys have been as blessed as I have been by the presence of God in you.

Praise God, I started my classes today, and they were so much fun. I am glad to just be off and running. It will be cool to watch God develop them. Jackson got his Chicken pox vaccination in addition to being under the weather from his teeth. I feel bad that he is feeling so horrible, but when he is not feeling good he is a total mama's boy. 99% of the time he is all about Mike, so I am secretly enjoying his neediness. Isn't that terrible? I know, I know but he is my baby and even in the hard, teething, shot induced daze, I love him and want the world for him. Kind of like God is towards us.

Anyway, enough gushing... God is good...good for making himself available through Jesus...good for making us "living stones"...good for being present in the world...good,good,good.

I am still recovering from a busy but wonderful weekend. Having the girl-half of the group stay with us was so fun. (Ana, Megan, Connie and Bethany, you are beautiful and wonderful sisters-in-Christ and my house is always open to you.) We did a "spa" night at my place on Sunday night and I haven't had that much fun in a long time. Occasionally, Amber and I will save up and visit a "real" spa or take a day and make our own retreat, but the at-home kind was so much better. Not just because I learned about new treatments or because I could do a steam, facial, manicure and pedicure (which would cost a fortune somewhere else), but because eleven of us could do everything together. We all brought food and anything spa-like we could think of and spent time together talking and worshiping. Another special thing for me was just being able to talk to other women about things and realizing that I'm not the only one with these feeling or thoughts. I don't have any sisters, so this kind of stuff really fires me up, not to mention the fact that relationships are everything in the family of God. He is all about restoration, and a bunch of chicks getting together to flow in the kingdom while painting our nails, blows my mind. I'm sure some of you are reading this and thinking how silly, but allowing Jesus to flow in anything and everything is where it's at, no matter how silly it may seem. I was close to not blogging about "spa" night because I started thinking about how stereotypical people can be and I didn't want my blog to make me seem like a girly girl. I thought I would preface the whole thing with how I love tennis and college football, but honestly, I love doing lots of things and girly things fall onto that list. I want to be diverse in my experiences and not ashamed of any part of how God made me. He put these desires in my heart. The passion and interests are by His doing and I am learning to love how He made me, without justifying or unnecessary explaining. As that happens, I realize more and more, it doesn't matter what other people may think I am or I'm not. I know the real me and am having a wonderful time growing up!

Thank you, Lord. Thanks for this weekend. I was so blown away by seeing you; and in so many people. Thank you for the beauty that you have given to people, to normal people, everywhere. Thank you for the good that you are, always. Praise you, Lord; that you are good--even to us, who do not deserve you. You can only do good. Nothing can ever make You anything else. You are good. You are good. You are good! You do not want to hurt us, to punish us, but you want us to come to you and get the really real.

I am realizing how I have chosen to let my view of God be shaped into something less than what He Is--completely holy, perfect and kind--always . . . and to everybody (the just and the unjust). He IS good, and can only do what is good--even to us, who were, and sometimes still are, rebels against Him. "Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow!" ALL! He gave me a job, my wife, my friends & my family--just to name a few. There is nothing that I have that is not a result of HIS kindness directly to me. Nothing! Thank you, dear God. Let me be a blessing to you--just a part of what you are. Let me follow your way. This is all (including every hair on my head) from you. It is your body, your kingdom, your earth. I want to give you your due. Who could ever? I'll give what I have. Even that I can't do without you! It's not fair!--but I love it. Thank you it's not fair! Thank you.

Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord!

Wow what a crazy weekend this has been. We had a group of friends in from Gainesville and it was nonstop from Saturday afternoon until lunch today. These folks are all college students at UF and part of our sending church. Anyway, we had a great time, but let me tell you, they got to see the real Mike and Amber. First of all, Jackson is still teething like crazy and doesn't sleep well when he's not in his crib (our little 2 bedroom townhouse got a workout this weekend). Also, Amber and I were at each other all weekend trying to juggle being hosts, the baby, and trying to have fun with our friends. There is no hiding a crappy attitude when your one-year-old is screaming at the top of his lungs and you have a few extra people in the house.

So, Rich, Ana, Paul, Connie, and Megan, thank you guys for putting up with our insanity this weekend. You guys are awesome guests (Ex: Paul spontaneously cleaned up our kitchen at 12:30 last night - I guess for a college student that's still early). We're excited to be a part of your journey in whatever way we can.

Well, I'm pretty fried to be perfectly honest. It occurred to me last week that I've been spending far too much time in front of this old computer pondering and pontificating and not enough time, well, just doing other stuff. We can't afford a vacation right now, but hey, we already live in Florida! So, without further adieu, I'm taking a week off from internet activity. Maybe I'll read some, play some golf, or just sit out on my back porch and talk to Jesus. Call it a long, extended sabbath.

On that note, I'll leave you with a quote to ponder...

"Johann Huizinga wrote a long and learned book, Homo Ludens, showing that culture is healthy only when it plays. Play is a distinctive mode of activity for humans. When we repress or neglect play we dehumanize culture. Huizinga writes to warn. As our civilization has advanced, it has lost touch with the distinctively human, and so while we show off a breathtakingly wealthy technology, our collective humanity has dipped well below the poverty level. We are less ourselves. Unpraying and unplaying, we deteriorate into skid-row consumers, life meagre with mere getting. Pastors must be in the avant garde of sabbath-keepers, reforesting our land, so savagely denuded by the humorless bulldozers, with playgrounds, prayergrounds." - Eugene Peterson, "Working the Angles"