God is changing me even if I don't feel like he is all of the time. Today I was dealing with being angry. For stupid things really and mostly because I was very, very tired. Anyway, I was praying "Lord, I don't want to hang on to this anger and I don't want to feel justified in hanging on to it! Please help me!". About 5 minutes later something happened. I found myself doing something for someone else. Something that was very small (at best) and maybe a little humiliating. Something that no one would ever know about and the person that it was done for would never even know it would of been done. As I was completing this act I thought, "Why am I doing this?". I really did not know and I returned home to take a much needed nap. As I was drifting off to sleep, I realized the anger was gone. ( as I thought of it, it ws gone at the exact moment I completed the act. To make it even cooler, I was happy, joyful and thankful afterwards) Not because I willed it away, but because Jesus was doing something through me for someone else. I did not even have time to think, He just did it and by doing this small act of service for another human, he set me free. Wow! I am still mulling over this one!

On the lighter side...from Rachel comes What would I look like as a Lego?


"Fighting injustice and releasing the captives with a sword in one hand and a Newcastle in the other..."


(Yes, that 'F' stands for 'Florida' - Go Gators! And no mom, I'm not a drunkard. It's a joke.)

Wow, I just found a great site (and another book I want to read). It's called the Mustard Seed Association by Tom Sine, author of the book "Mustard Seed vs. McWorld." Below are some tidbits I found really interesting. (Thanks, John.)

Here's a comparison of the values inheirent in Modern Western Culture and the kingdom of God: Mustard Seed vs. McWorld

"What we have done is to inadvertently succumb to a dualistic model of faith and modern culture. In this dualism the living action of our faith through discipleship and stewardship are compartmentalized and subject to the governing force of modern culture. In spite of all the talk about Christ's lordship, everyone knows that the expectations of modern culture come first. Everyone knows that getting ahead in the job comes first. Getting ahead in the suburbs comes first. Getting the kids off to their activities comes first. And we, as Christians, tend to make decisions in these areas pretty much like everyone else does, based on our income, our professions, and our social status." - A Dualistic Life: Who Arranges the Furniture of Our Lives?


There is lots to mine here.

AKMA has some strong words about the whole Pledge of Allegiance deal. Good stuff. Also, a blog-discussion with Dave who is giving some great reasons for "Why I don't go to church". AKMA's response is worth the read.

Hey, the Renovation of the Heart Blog has been kind of quiet this week. Has Dallas put everyone to sleep?

The Pledge of Allegiance has been ruled unconsitutional in the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals because the phrase "One Nation Under God" amounts to a government endorsement of religion. The marginalization of God and Christianity in the U.S. continues.

Some American Christians want to return to the good old 1950's. Sorry, those days are officially over. So do we cry and kick and scream when we aren't getting our way anymore? I say, instead of teaching our kids the pledge, why don't we teach them to say "The kingdom of God is here!"

Pledge Declared Unconstitutional

Well, I had a blast at the Musikgarten conference. I learned a lot, not only about my business and how young children learn, but about the kingdom.

Firstly, I spent 9 hours a day, in a class room type setting. I learned a ton and met some wonderful people who are as passionate about children as I am. But, I was not able to eat as well as I could of if I had more of a choice of what to eat, I got no exercise and I was not outside for any more than a walk to the car and back. I had to sit in a straight backed chair in a room with very poor lighting. None of this really bothered me until the last day about 3:30 when it hit me. I don't feel human at all. I have had no quiet space dedicated to meditating on Jesus (morning office of prayer). Although I had a deep awareness of God's presence throughout the day I have come to crave a morning time of "sacred space". I have not been able to exercise my body and contemplate being formed by the master through it (you guys know I am addicted to Pilates - in a good way). I ate poorly because it was fast and cheap (which was high starch, fat and carbs - nothing healthy, green and fresh). Not to mention I had no time to be outside in space that was not formed by man but formed by God. And to top it all off, I was busy from sun up to sun down.

Do you see where I am going? Some of you reading this may think I am a buff, vegetarian, environmentalist, monk who is passionate about all of the things I listed above. Well, I am not...but God is showing me that to have my life completely integrated into him, I have to be actively working in all areas (food, work, creation, exercise, silence etc). It finally clicked with me, when at the end of the day, I thought, "If I don't get out of this room I am going to die".

So I say all of this to say...take a walk during your lunch break, (outside), eat a salad for God's sake (I mean that literally) sit in a quiet space for 10 minutes before you additively check emails and start running at work(maybe if we start with 10 we will grow in to 15 and so on). I am learning if I don't do these things I can never fully be human. Actually, that these things are more real than the fast paced worked crazed life we think is real.

Mike made a statement on the hour long commute back home about how long drives make him sad. I asked what he meant. He said "Because so many people live half their life in a car, driving like crazy." Put that together with 9 hour work days in poorly lit offices with bad food and no exercise and no silence to hear anything let alone God makes for very joyless creatures (whether they know Jesus or not). It makes me want to throw myself on the mercy of Jesus and cry, "Lord how can I help them? I want them to have your peace. I want them to experience your real life".

So I am grateful for the last three days. Not only the conference and the business lessons, but the deep burning conviction it has given me to live a completely integrated life in God's kingdom and help those around me do the same.

Some exerpts from my retreat notes:

From a meditation on Romans 8:1-17 - "God has been acting on my behalf for a long, long time. His action now, to give me the eternal kind of life now and to deeply reassure me of my sonship, is all part of this “Different Plan”. My response, by the Spirit’s power and leadership, is to think about things that please the Spirit (to have God ever-present in my mind – to think his thoughts) and to turn away from the urgings of the flesh. The natural result is the kind of relationship like a tender father has with his children."

Romans 8:15 from the Message - “So don’t you see that we don’t owe this old do-it-yourself life one red cent? There’s nothing in it for us, nothing at all. The best thing to do is give it a decent burial and get on with your new life God’s Spirit beckons. There are things to do and places to go!"

And my response: "I realize that I really don’t owe my old life and old ways of operating anything. There is no sentimental value in hanging on to them any longer. I don’t need to protect myself, be constantly analyzing myself, comparing myself to others, or doubting my place with God. God’s Spirit is whispering to the deepest parts of who I am, in my heart, that I am God’s son. Period."

Final thoughts: "I think this retreat has given me a deeper understanding of my identity in Christ, his action in my spiritual formation, and how this Jesus revolution is really the only hope for the ruined world."

Psalm 149:4-6:
“For the Lord delights in his people;
he crowns the humble with salvation.
Let the faithful rejoice in this honor.
Let them sing for joy as they lie on their beds.
Let the praises of God be in their mouths,
And a sharp sword in their hands…”

More to come...this hotel connection is really slow.

Hello. We're still alive.

It's raining like crazy in South Florida. Amber and I are in Fort Lauderdale for the next two days. She is attending a Musikgarten training course for our business. I threw together a last minute personal retreat.

It's amazing that even with our lifestyle (owning our own business, no cable t.v., one child, no dog) and given that our community is trying to learn how to pray and seek God in silence, it is still difficult to get alone and get quiet. Sometimes I feel like the entire western civilization is pressing down on me to stay busy, noisy, or just self-medicated (with entertainment or beer - you pick the drug). Sacred retreat space is so rare, but so necessary.

I'll have a little online time at night so I'll let you know how it's going.

Okay, I think God is telling me something...I have always been the planner in our marriage. You know, the one who calls maintenance people when something's broken, the one who plans out the meals for the week etc. Well, we have been talking about taking a vacation this summer since last summer. I was hoping to take a BIG one, and we might have but God had other things in store. Like T starting his own practice etc...Honestly, I'm so glad. I would give up a million trips for T being fulfilled and doing what God is calling him to do. But I was hoping to do both (how selfish am I). Well, we thought a smaller trip was definitely doable and I got excited and got to planning. Up until today we had plans to stay in the Keys at a really nice resort. I say "had" because the travel agency emailed me that the room rates are double what they originally said and there is nothing they can do. The funny thing is the whole time I was excited but never felt this was it. Being earthy myself, I just wanted it because it seemed fun and I am so ready to take a vacation. I finally realized I needed to stopped thinking out of my neediness and give this up to God. He knows what I need and when I need it better than I EVER could. Well, as soon as I did that (it was about 15 minutes ago), I felt like God was saying let "T" plan the whole thing. Whoa!!!! I have more control issues than I thought I had. Didn't all those go away last time I had ministry time? No?! What's neat is that as I walk this out, it is giving "T" the opportunity to grow in the other direction. Now he can "bless" me and I can relax. Funny, but when I think of it that way...why didn't I get this sooner?

Ahhhh, so earthiness is what we call this. Do you want to hear what Mikes other half thinks of his earthiness. Let's just say, once he wrote it all down in a nice little blog, I smiled and said "Ahhh, that has been the problem". You see, because up until this point, a smile has not been what I have had, more like grumbling and complaining. Like what ever happened to being on the same team. This morning I was, how shall I say, "out of sorts" so I desperately spent time with God. Not in the word, or praying, because I was too far gone to really enter into something that cerebral, so I started to paint, with the prayer "Jesus Help, I am a mess!". I had a great beginning to a painting that I was really enjoying. As I started to paint God said "relax". Sometimes all you need is a word from God to clear the fog. I was having fun painting and God was having fun "forming". (me I should say). As I was silent God kept speaking. Things like "It's a process, enjoy it, I am enjoying it." Then in the midst of enjoying the "process" of painting and enjoying God's presence, I ruined my painting. I tried something that in my mind looked great but on paper, well, it stunk. I was just about to be upset when God said "Relax, you are learning". Well, thanks God for putting it all into perspective. I am learning. Mike is learning. So in case you have not figured it out yet, Mike and I have no idea what we are doing, we are just crazy enough to trust the Jesus is in charge of his church, and if we follow him with all that we have then it will be "right as rain". A Little advice to the other half of church planting teams....Have grace with your husband, your children and yourself. Relax, chuck the plan and Trust Jesus!

Bear - I love you! Sorry for my lack of grace with your process. I really am blessed to have a man who is willing to "not have it all together" and be honest about it.

We have used this blog as a way to chronicle the events / questions / revelations etc. on the quest to discovering what it means to be church in West Palm. I think we've all been pretty honest and transparent - as someone put it to me in an email - earthy. Well, lately I've been seeing my 'earthy' side show up a little too often.

I had a friend tell me before we left to move here that church planting is like the birthing process and just as messy. (How's that for earthy?) Probably the messiness for us has been compounded by trying to birth a business and raise a newborn son at the same time. Sometimes I forget that what we've gotten ourselves into is not 'normal life'. I wake up thinking that every day should go smooth, that our business will grow, that our marriage will stay healthy, that I'll be maturing as a follower of Jesus. Well, it isn't that simple. It's easy to slip into bouts of doubting introspection. For example, as a pastor in this way of being church we're experimenting with, what really is my job? Peterson says mainly to teach people how to pray. I feel totally inadequate for that task, so how do I move forward? I can't go out and make something happen (i.e. drum up a big crowd to preach to and start a bunch of lame programs). And learning the fine art of listening and responding to God is hard work that takes years to develop.

If I've been fooling anyone into believing that I have it all together (that I'm a confident, focused visionary who will stop at nothing until the world is changed for the better) then I'm sorry to disappoint. Most of the time I feel like John Wimber: "I'm just a fat man trying to get to heaven." Except I'm really not all that fat. For me it's more like: "I'm just a shy kid trying to get to heaven."

Last night I became abundantly aware of the incredible community of people God has allowed me to lead. I don't think any of you are fooled otherwise you would have jumped ship a long time ago. I thank God that you all have infinitely more patience than I do. You guys have stuck with the unanswered questions, the lack of 'measurable results', the "long obedience in the same direction" with no complaining or questioning of how I try and do my job.

For all you aspiring church planters out there, let me give you a small word of advice. Forget about the two-year-plan, core group interviews, and demographic studies. Forget about the John Maxwell leadership training seminar, postmodern church planting conference, or reading the latest Len Sweet book. Forget about searching blogs and websites for 'the answer'. If God is calling you to plant a church, find 5 or 6 friends that you love and that love you and purpose to go on an adventure together. Don't (pretend to) give them the answers, just pose a few simple questions and say, "I'm going to be here with you to work this out for as long as it takes." Love each other and whoever God puts in your path. Everything else will take care of itself.

Al and I had a great time in Minneapolis...It was really cool to see how God put together our very quick visit to find a new home...The best part was realizing how much God knows exactly what we need and where we need to be and He makes it happen. It sounds so trite and cute to say that, we hear it all the time on refrigerator magnets and bookmarks with little tassels on them, but it REALLY is true. I was letting that thought sink in tonight while mowing my grass (it finally stopped raining way out here).

On a different note, we met a cool couple at a vineyard church in a small suburb of minneapolis. paul (the guy) is currently reading "the divine conspiracy" for the second time (my hero) and was about to read "renovation". He mentioned that regardless of our church attendance decisions, they would love to hang out once we move (cool)...I was sharing with Mike last Wednesday that I felt like God was naturally (or maybe supernaturally) speaking to people in churches all over about the stuff we've been experimenting with...It turns out that God is doing that and I felt that these guys (and probably others in that church) are looking to do church a little different than usual. we'll see what God is up to........

See you guys tomm. night. bye

I am so mad.. I just lost an entire blog before I posted it. Aghhhh. anyway.. I was saying...

It has been a little while since I last posted. I am starting to have a complex about how much I am posting but I am realizing that God is using this to help me process things, so I can get over it if you can:-)

Last night we had friends spontaneously call us. They came over for dinner and the movie Blackhawk Down. (It was awesome by the way). I am blogging about this because it really did something in me. I felt like God was showing me a glimpse of what is to come. When Mike and I were in Gainesville, we were famous for "popping-in" on people. We would call (sometimes) and bring dinner and "hang out". We had appropriate alone time and family time of course, but we just really liked being with people. I never realized how precious those times where until we moved away.

In Gainesville, a 20 min. drive to a friends house was a hike. Here however, 30 min is the normal commute between friends. (at least now) So naturally we thought the "pop-in" was a thing of the past. I realized how sad that made me feel. I love having an "open house" for people to come by whenever. Our pastors were like that in Gainesville. We were always showing up on their doorstep to hang out and talk. ( I really love them for that!!!) When these friends were daring enough to call and "impose" it made me feel so blessed. Blessed that they would assume that they could, would and should spend their "extra" time with us. It makes me want to e-mail all of our friends and say ..."trust me it is not an imposition". I love it when Ali calls and brings herself over after work because she would rather not drive home. But come on she is family...literally. Theoretically... I can't say no to her :-) We have been close to the Freemans for so long that I feel like our houses are extensions of the others. I know where Kim keeps her knives in the kitchen and she knows where I keep mine. You know, that kind of stuff.

Vineyard Central in Cinn. experiment with communal living arrangements and I think that is awesome. Actually, I think I could be up for it if it was the right situation. I know it would be stretching but what isn't in the kingdom. I know I am rambling but I am still thinking through all of this. Basically, I want to share my life and my family's life with people. Not just in planned ways, although that is good, but in ordinary, spontaneous, everyday ways. I can only invite people to dinner so many times, until I start making the dinner and bringing "us" to them. Use the comments to tell me what you think about the "pop-in".

As suggested by Amber, here is a page where we'll be chronicling our experiments in corporate spiritual exercise. It's small now, but it will grow as we continue to experiment. The Gymnasium

Can I just say how much fun I am having experimenting with God. I love learning about all of these disciplines, and trying some of them. They are hard,yes, but totally fruitful. Anything worth having is worth working hard for. I just had an amazing experience with Prayer. It is a little too long to blogg, but let's say, I was totally being tutored by the Master. He was showing me how to pray. How to enter into it with him,and not just stand outside of him reading a list of requests off to him, like Santa Clause. I will give you all the "blow by blow" commentary Sunday morning. Gotta run, the baby is awake:-)

Last night was a very cool time with friends and Jesus. I talked to Mike about putting a link on the site that really details our journey with experimentation. (different disciplines we are engaging etc.) I think it would be cool in the history of our community to chronicle the experiments that we are going through as a community. Not only that, but it can let others who are joining us around the world, observe as well. What do you all think? Have a good day... love you all

My friend and coach Todd Hunter just updated his site, postmodernmission.org.

"I am going to apprentice myself to Jesus in order to learn to live in Ultimate Reality; to learn to do what he did and say the things he said in his confident, peaceful manner. I intend to be with him (through the Holy Spirit) doing the necessary and appropriate things (means of grace) for apprehending this new kind of life. I do this for the sake of God; to work with him as he extends the benevolent rule and reign of his kingdom to others. I do not do this to earn or merit anything; it is my simple, but passionate (pearl of Great price and treasure in the field) cooperation."

Gosh, I just realized that I'm not posting that much anymore now that my teammates are putting their two cents in.

I've been thinking a lot about the Psalms lately and their role in our discipleship and in the life of the church. I'm starting to see that the answer (or answers) to "What is Church?" are pretty simple - like people gathering to worship, or friends in a coffee shop talking about their faith, or people selling all to follow Jesus to the poor. If church is just a building or service the Psalms are relegated to slogans or fight songs, but lose their punch in the outside world. In kingdom life, the Psalms give us God-language to communicate with each other and with God about what we see, what we experience, and how we move forward on the narrow road.

On Sunday, we experimented with praying two Psalms, 25 and 58. Psalm 25 is an everyday average Psalm. "To you, O Lord I lift up my soul. I trust in you, my God!...Show me the path where I should walk, O Lord; point out the right road for me to follow." It's mostly about guidance, forgivenss, mercy, praise. Stuff of everyday life on the planet. This is a high traffic Psalm - one that gets used like your favorite t-shirt or sandals. But then there's Psalm 58. "Justice - do you rulers know the meaning of the word?...All your dealings are crooked; you hand out violence instead of justice...Break off their fangs, O God! Smash the jaws of these lions, O Lord...The godly will rejoice when they see injustice avenged. They will wash their feet in the blood of the wicked." I don't know about you, but I can't "relate" to this Psalm very easily. Let's just say it's not going on any precious moments figurine anytime soon. But yet it stands there, a part of the Prayer Book of the People of God.

Maybe the reason we can relate to Psalm 25 and not 58 is that we are hiding in our everyday clothes. Days, weeks, and years pass by and we walk around "business as usual". But these "warrior songs" are right there, waiting to be sung. Sure, most days we wear our sandals. But somedays we have to put on the fatigues and strap on the boots.

Started using blogtrack tonight. Looks like a pretty good service for those of us who hate searching through our Favorites list to find blogs that have been updated.

I saw the movie "About a Boy" yesterday and it got me thinking about relationships, only with a slightly different perspective. After reading Amber's blog, I was reminded again of my thoughts. I don't want to give away any of the movie, so I'll try to be as vague as possible. The story is about a young boy and a late 30-something’s journey toward family and love. What really hit me were two statements about relationships the boy made. The first was when he said, "Two aren't enough" regarding the realization that he and his mom weren't enough people, with respect to watching out for/emotionally taking care of each other. He didn't know all the reasons why, but that was the process he was in (as well as the story line). Then, secondly, he makes a statement something like this, "I don't think couples are the wave of the future." He wasn't talking about guy/girl couples but rather isolated couples. The whole "it takes a village" approach was what he wanted. As I thought about this, and how much the world is wanting family, I was reassured that we are not crazy but rather, in light of our community and what we are trying to build, right with what is needed in our society. Bless God!!

The Renovation of the Heart blog officially kicks off today. Feel free to join in by using comments.

I am reading Foster's book Prayer and it is really causing me to look at prayer differently. I have been praying that Jesus would reveal more of himself to me in ordinary everyday things. I wanted to share something he clarified for me . (I have been seeing it more and more lately, but last night God condensed the process down for me into one sentence).

Time is the only thing we really own of any value that can buy anything of real worth and the only thing worth "buying" with our time is relationship.

Deeper relationship with God and through that deeper relationship with others. That is the only thing we will take with us into eternity. We all know that we won't take things with us, but I think we forget that we do take relationship with us. I really love the book Boundaries by McCloud but, I think Christians can take it too far and insert the western idea of having your "own" time. I am finding that if I continue to create "sacred" quiet space with the Father, that kind of alone time will give me what I really want. Peace. I assume that time by myself will feed my tired soul, but I have found, it doesn't. Out of "sacred" space I find the "rhythm of the kingdom". Time with God then time with others. Constantly flowing back and forth. The whole concept is amazing when you really journey deeper into it with the Father.

Just felt like uploading something today...meet Jackson, age 9 1/2 months...

I just posted an article in the toolbox by Amber about her ongoing quest to grow in creativity. Finding Jesus in a Swirl of Colors.

I read Alan's thoughts. I'm lovin' it...This part really hit me: "Jesus was WHAT He was on the outside because of WHO He was on the inside - one flowed from the other. Did He grow in wisdom and knowledge about who He was along the way? Yes, it would seem so. Did that make Him who He was or just give Him more living knowledge of the fact of who He was. To me, it's obvious - He was who He was from conception - and then He outwardly grew into it - but He had to do that in order to live the who." Good stuff...

Alan Creech has posted some good thoughts about what it means to be a "follower of Jesus".

Lately, I have been having extreme "go to Jesus" moments. You know, those days/weeks where nothing's wrong, everything's wrong. It's even hard to write down all the thoughts in my head. I restarted journaling last night and had to practically make myself stop. Even now as I type, I am remembering a prayer I prayed a while ago about going deeper with God. So far this week all the usual routines have been busted and I have been learning to go with the flow of life. I always thought of myself as pretty flexible but knew there were areas that needed stretching (nothing too major of course-yeah right!) Then I stopped and looked around, wondering why I was in pain. I realized I was and am, nose to knees in the middle of a stretching exercise. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit is with me, showing me how to breathe through the stretch and allow God to deepen it. It is pretty exhausting, but remembering His love is everything I need, carries me.

Have you ever had experience of "missing it"? You know what I mean, when you push a little too hard, or you try to be God by saying what you think he wants to say to somone at a particular time? And you say it and it falls dead on the floor with a resounding plop. I had one of those today. Let's just say that God taught me a little more about his kingdom in my little flub up.

But then there are the moments when you "nail it" right on the head and God's kingdom explodes everywhere. I also had one of those moments this week. You know, when you just respond to a little nudging from the Lord, and you think it seems silly and you feel a little foolish. And then you say it and it soars and brings you and that person closer together and weaves God into the center of your relationship.

In my opinion, both of them keep you coming back for more of God. The "missed it" moment keeps you mindful of who God is and to be ever watchful of his hand in things, and the "nail it" moment keeps you in the same place. It is kind of like playing golf. You hit 20 awful (and in my case really awful shots) and then you hit one sweet one and it keeps you coming back for more.

I am seeing how my story is really integrated into the larger story of God. The deeper you go into community and relationship with God and others, you really begin to feel the excitement of living out part of His amazing story.

"Prayer means that we deal first with God and then with the world. Or, that we experience the world first not as a problem to be solved but as a reality in which God is acting." - Eugene Peterson, Working the Angles

I confess that I am a slow, narrow reader. Some people I know read more books in a month than I have in the last five years. I respect that prowess, however, it just doesn't jive with my reality.

At this stage in my life, Eugene Peterson seems to tear me limb from limb with everything he writes. He makes a very simple assertion in "Working the Angles" - that prayer is secondary language. It is fundamentally a response. God speaks first, then we speak back. Prayers that try to stand alone are like cut flowers in a vase: "As long as they are artificially provided for with a container of water, they give a touch of beauty. But not for long: soon they drop and are discarded."

I have been a follower of Jesus for a long time but prayer has always seemed to be an elusive thing. Maybe it is because I have viewed prayer as icing on the cake - something to kick off worship times or potluck dinners but not as where the real work gets done. "Most of the people we meet, inside and outside the church, think prayers are harmless but necessary starting pistols that shoot blanks and get things going." Even in the discussion about "What is Church?" and "What does it mean to be an authentic Christian?" am I more attentive to the latest idea than to what God is speaking?

I checked out the comments from Rachel and Sara. Honestly, I found it a little weird to write my feelings down so anyone can read them. But then I went and checked out their websites and now I think this is really amazing. One of the neatest things is seeing how we are all alike in so many ways. We all want acceptance, family and most of all love. It shows me how large the world is many respects, but that our Father unites His family of believers.

We now have comments...as you can see of course. Please leave them at will.

I wanted to pass the peace blog-style this week. Hop on board as you feel led.

Mike - I love the way you love me
Jackson - I love how you have no fear. You totally trust Mommy and Daddy will be there for you. I need to be more like that with Jesus.
Ali - I love your willingness to change..even when it takes hard decisions.. like Minnesota
Mark - I love your dedication to your work..as if it is truly what Jesus made you for...
Kim - I love your all or nothing approach.. because once you get a hold of something..look out.
T- I love your complete faith in Jesus that he directs every move you make...
Inez- I love your conviction to do what is right..no matter what others think

Just praising God for a wonderful weekend. I am more and more excited to see the Father moving in our lives as we grow deeper as a community and more into family. I went for a walk alone the other day just to talk with God and I was overwhelmed by the creation around me. I have been praying lately for more desire to quite down and listen. We all talk about wanting more time to be in God's presence but if I am really honest, I have the time just not the desire. I'm tired of choosing anything else I can think of rather than time with Jesus. Saturday night T and I went out to dinner and the Prince song "Kiss" played while we were eating. It reminded me again that we have the choice of where our "extra time" and our "kiss" is bestowed. The things around us, including people and ourselves, want more and more time and affection (worship) yet we say, "If only there was more to give Jesus." I definitely need God to place more desire in my heart for spending time with Him. Only out of that will I be able to desire spending more time with the community of believers around me. Pray that I/we continue allowing the change to occur.

Just thinking this morning while shaving (always a great time to hear from God) about the difference between a rebel and a revolutionary. As we continue to look at church in a fresh way and look at what our lives look like under the reign of Jesus, I'm beginning to wonder if being the man of peace Jesus talks about is one or the other or both. I see a rebel as, at the core, a divisive, chaos-seeking, reactionary ultimately fighting against someone or something that is invading their rights. A revolutionary however seems to have a more noble purpose about them...one that I think is much more like the Jesus we read about. So with "what is church?" and every other question, I want my answers to be bathed in love, grace and be focused on building up His church...bye

I am beginning to understand how God is full of unbelievable joy every time he creates......

The "Renovation of the Heart" Book Blog is now full. It should be an amazing discussion. There are all kinds taking part - Vineyard folks, house church heroes, a female Methodist minister, college students, and grandparents. I'm putting together the blog and will be sending out invitations soon...