Kids Don't Need to Deconstruct

They actually need to construct and it is our job as adults to help them do that. The issue is how do we help them construct without the baggage that we all have just thrown out. Hmmm, it can be a bit tricky . Children from birth -6 are at a VERY sensitive period and they are ripe for planting amazing kingdom messages. I am realizing that that could be more structured than just letting them be with the grown ups. That is good and part of it, but we also have an amazing window to really nurture what God is doing already if we will watch and follow the leading of the child. I promise you their questions will be a good place to start.

Mike and I were trained to plant churches and we pretty much worked our fingers to the bone to do it "right". You know.... do everything we could so we could help people follow Jesus better. The only problem was, we were getting pretty mad because only a few of us were working and no one else seemed to care. Especially in the realm of "children's ministry". I think that department alone can burn someone out on ministry for life. We didn't even have kids yet. When our wheels feel of our little red wagon so to speak, we set ALL of it down, and said we will only pick back up what the Father shows us to. Maybe it is better known as deconstructing everything we had ever known about this thing we call the Church. Over the past few years many have asked the question "What do you do with the kids." I actually get asked this question very frequently from people all over the world, so here are my 2 cents worth.

I am no expert, I am just passionate about seeing our kids raised in the kingdom in an integrated holistic way. They know that you don't go to church but rather we are the church so we have crossed that hurdle early. I have observed our children from day one in this type of church environment. They actually have no other concept of Church. Mike and I have been very intentional about how we are presenting the kingdom of God and this life on "the way" to our kids. My background is in early childhood education with an emphasis on brain development and a love for the Montessori method. I am also certified through the Catechesis of the Good Shepherd and have read lots of stuff from people much wiser than I on the topic. We have been mindful of centering our children on the person of Jesus and his reality and the kingdom parables first and then spiraling outward towards the whole story. So you may find it weird that there are actually some stories that our kids don't know yet. Like Noah and the Ark or Adam and Eve. They have never even seen a Veggie Tales. (I have tried but they freak them out a bit too much - I actually realize now that there is too much drama for them. Young children need to feel safe and loved, and not scared to death) We actually just now started talking about the concept of Satan and that was only because Jackson began asking the questions and we started filling in the blanks. So where am I going with all of this you may ask? Children up until age 6 need very concrete things because of there developmental state. They need to feel safe and protected and if you hit those notes, you will soar in richness. You really can make a child feel safe and loved on how you present the word of God to them as opposed to scared and overwhelmed. You actually can read more about it from anything by Sophia Coveletti.

So the thing that really began cluing me into this was actually our kids. I felt like God really started calling me to do something concrete and specific with them daily. If I didn't give them good food to eat than, the world would give them something and Lord knows that isn't a good deal. About a month ago I was getting the kids ready for school. The first thing out of Jackson's mouth was "Mommy can you take me back to that place you took me before, where it is church just for kids?" I had taken him to Awana a few months ago because I did it when I was his age and remember loving it. I never took him back for my issues more than his. Don't get me wrong, our kids love our church family and ask to be with them daily, but they also need something that they can have all their own and this little question was a small directive for me. It is true that God is calling children, and if you are sensitive to follow God and his work in the child, you will be blown away by their depth.

So I pretty much don't expect our kids to sit still in circle during our gatherings. It isn't fair. I want them to be exposed to the grown ups listening, loving, learning and singing together, but I also, want them to have a special time that is centered on their needs. So that is what we are doing. They need an intentional structure just for them. So whatever your context or background....go to the Father and ask him for some guidance and instruction on what to do. Read some great books and take the kids out of the group gathering and feed their little soul with food they can eat. They will come back in when they are ready. Actually God will call them back in. We have tons of 9 year olds and older kids who sit in our gatherings and love it and participate and even lead worship, but the little guys need a different scene..and those are my two cents.